My Happily Ever After

the girl who wished she'd never been born,
was left treading water
to keep from drowning in your scorn.
she waited for you, today.
but you never showed.
and she needed you today.
but you never showed.
so as she cried into the night,
deep inside,
she was losing a fight.
she gave you her heart,
to love and protect.

but all you did was smash it against the pavement.

like broken glass.

and now because of you,

she has to lock it up.

in a cold, hard, icy chest until it can heal.

there is no way in heaven or hell

you could know how she feels.

so my friend im asking you,

will you heal her broken heart?

no.

you wont.

you cant.

you only want the attention.

you only want the fame.

you'll try to get her back,

but you'll realize,

you'll know,

that she cant chase you forever.

you'll leave her out of breath.

she's gonnna stop running in circles around you.

she's goin to get over you,

and at that very moment,

your goin to wish you had let het catch you.

now, she's got her eyes on a new target.

and she's aiming...

she knows that He will always love her.

he wont let her fall and get hurt.

she was looking for her cinderella story scene,

and she knows he'll give her

her fairytale ending.

he'll be him.

she'll be her.

they'll call it love.

they'll call it forever.

and they'll call it

happily ever after.

have a holly jolly christmas!!!

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glittery images!!!

One moment to realize...

Broken heart.

broken hopes.

her soul dies slowly,

with the steepest slope.

standing shakily,

on the 17th story

she jumped without

a second thought.

falling fast with

broken wings,

she let go all of her hopes and dreams.

falling fast, through the cracks.

falling fast, into the black.

and then,

she realized,

the moment she gave up,

she couldve gone back and

changed it all.

she couldve

won the fight.

Ember 4 evr

Courage....

i loooove this song!!!!!!!!!! im listenin 2 it right now.........

yuppers...

a cow abduction

just trying 2 c if putting a video on would work....

hey wassup my ppls???

omg!! im so happy 2day!!! idk y...i guess i just am....cuz u kno im all bipolar like that. im baby sitting right now... its not so hard...make food....dont answer the door and let them watch tv!!

omg!! i was totally stoked 4 this one choir dancing thing that my private skool had...(yea, ive been goin 2 a stuckup private skool with filthy rich ppl now.....the social worker is paying 4 it...)

we sang a whole bunch of christmas songs....and im so glad the outfit we wore didnt show my wings...although my wings did make it look like i had a hunched back.
o well!!

and if anyone can help we with a dillema...post a comment plllzzzzz...everyone keeps telling me 2 4get about my ex....but hes so sweet.
but he dumped my ass.....bet he told my friend he still liked me...but then he didnt talk 2 me...and now he does....and idk if i should tell him that i still have feeling 4 him or not.....
so someone pllzzzz help me and post a comment!!!

omg...i swear, if evanna pops into my head one more fuckin time.....im gonna murder myself.....DONT ASK!!

Shes not as hardcore as you think

if you looked inside a girl,

you would see how much she really cries,

you would see so many secrets && lots of lies,

but what you’ll see the most….

Is how hard it is to stay strong

When nothing is right, and everything is wrong.

Ember 4 evr

glitter!!!

i found this awesome website that makes ur pictures glittery!!!!! hooray!!! lol
[Glitterfy.com - *Glitter Photos*]

Good Morning....

or else, not so good......Evanna's dead.....

i cant beleive it... she was always the one who told the flock to do their best, or try harder. Ya know, to never give up. she gave up. She gave up on her own life. and she could've won the fight.

she chose a permanent end to a temporary problem. i g2g.....and i rilly dont want to talk about Evanna anymore.....too painful.

Because she was always the one i could talk to...=[

Ember 4 evr

I Do

I DO
When you said "I do"
I knew it was to good to be true.
Because three months later, you let me down.
And a year later I knew you didn’t care.
All the times you said,
“I love you”
Did you really meant it?
‘cause when you pulled the trigger,
That said "I don’t ".
You left me.
And now I wish I understood.
That
“I love you”,
Meant nothing
To you .
--Evanna Shakouri"

i am

I am the person you bullied at school
I am the person who didn’t know how to be cool
I am the person you alienated
I am the person you ridiculed and hated
I am the person who sat on her own
I am the person who walked home alone
I am the person you scared everyday
I am the person who had nothing to say
I am the person with hurt in her eyes
I am the person you never saw cry
I am the person living alone with all her fears
I am the person destroyed by her peers
I am the person who drowned in your scorn
I am the person who wished she’d never been born
I am the person you destroyed for “fun”
I am the person, but not the only one
I am the person whose name you didn’t know
I am the person you just can’t let go
I am the person who had feelings too
And I was a person, just like you

Ember 4 evr

i love you

have you ever fallen in love,

but knew they did not care?

have you ever felt like crying,

but knew you’d get no where?

have you ever watched them walk away…

not wanting them to go?

and whispered “i love you” softly…

not wanting them to know?

you cried all night in misery,

and almost went insane.

there’s nothing in this world,

that causes so much pain.

if i could choose between love and death,

i think i’d rather die.

love is fun, but it hurts too much,

and the price you pay is high.

so i say, don’t fall in love,

you’ll be hurt before it’s through.

you see my friend you ought to know,

i fell in love with you.

Ember 4 evr

Suicidal

Tonight I’m so alone,
This sorrow takes a hold.
Don’t leave me here so cold,
Don’t leave me here like this.
You can’t hear me scream from the abyss.
Falling into black.
Slipping through the cracks.
Falling to the depths…
I can’t ever come back.
Falling inside the black…
Falling inside the black...

so...bored....uuuuuggggggghhhhhh

im stayin home from skool 2day cuz i got some sorta sinus infection thing or watevr....

=[

i didnt pay attention to the doctor....i was trying to figure out wat 2 do incase of an emergency.

hospitals really creepy me out just incase ur wondering....they bring back too many horrible memories. so im just chillin @ evanna's house. her parents are weird.

here is their contribute to christmas:

christmas is probably my favorite holiday. not because of presents....who needs those? (by the way for christmas i want a new laptop: sony 14.1 VAIO VGNCT 240E/B laptop PC w/ Intel Core 2 Duo Processor T7250, black or red) srry, i just need a new laptop...this one is always screwing up and it doesnt save very easily...but back to wat is was talking about...

i love christmas just because everyone is closer together. my mom was never really close to me, and as if you couldnt tell because i found out the other day that she sold me to a couple of mad scientists....WHO GAVE ME WINGS!!! but thats ok... i mean, not that i am one, but ive always been obsessed with angels and their wings...

i loooooove the snow... its so pretty. i love to take pictures in it. but not of me. if the world was OK with there being mutant freaks, and they didnt want to shove them up in a zoo...i would be more than glad to shed my jacket and take pictures of me in the snow... but no, no one wants to c a mutant freak....theyre just ugly freaks....

new subject.....this is probably goin to be my longest post in a long time....but i will definately be keeping up...cuz i love blogging, but i dont love my laptop. i NEED a new one...*wink*wink*

here is MY contribute to christmas:

i should probably get goin.....bye luv ya!

Ember 4 evr

GOBBLEGOBBLE!!!!

ok, its rilly been a while since ive posted anything. but i promise that ill b posting almost everyday now!! or at least ill try.
so 2 catch u up on things... i stayed @ evannas house 4 thanks giving... it was pretty fun....
and im like, rilly tired right now...
so im gonna go 2 bed....bye
luv ya!!

Ember 4 evr

sorry you guys

hey, wats up? im so sorry that i havent posted anything in a while... my bad...actually, its my computer's bad. to catch u up on things......last time i posted anything, i wuz too sad to talk about....i think im gettin over it.....

my boyfriend broke up with me....2 weeks ago. amazing. it takes me that long to recover. but ya kno, thats just how i roll. i think im startin to crush on another guy, but im not sure. i really dont see him alot....only like, once a week. he might help me get over the things that have happened.

life has its ups and downs, just go with the flow. if things were meant to happen, for the better or worse, they will happen. weather you want them to or not. if things dont go the way you had hoped, just sit back, relax, and let them work themselves out.

sorry, thats me going into my creepy poet mode. ayup..... srry, gotta go....thnx 4 stayin by my side and waitin 4 me 2 post somethin.....

its nice to know im loved.

Ember 4evr

too sad to think of a title...=[

Sometime in your life you will love a certain person and they try to get closer. You let them. One day he will be the best thing that ever happened to you. The next, he'll break up with you when you feel like nothing horrible could ever even think about touching you. In the end, you just end up hurt. He leaves you alone, sad, and confused. So try to keep that person close. Very close.


Why doesnt life have happy endings. Like there are in movies?

Why do they say that " just because a person doesnt love you the way you want them to, doesnt mean they dont love you with all their heart"? Only the let you know that they just say that to keep your mind off of the horrible things that make you cry yourself to sleep.


What does it mean when people say, "The thing about love is if you do it right, you never have to hit the ground". Because everyone will love someone in their lifetime. Well, i fell in love. or i thought i did. Now im headed for the ground at 100mph. splat. Ive hit the pavement. Headfirst. The thing about that little saying is, just cause youve had your spirits smashed against the concrete because you fell in "love", doesnt mean you didnt enjoy every second of it.


I promise i will never forget the day we kissed or the day we met. the sky may fall and the stars may too. but in the end, I will still love you. I love how my profile is about that one guy, and yet he never knows that every word is about him.


When a guy breaks up with you there are a couple questions that come into your mind right away:
Was 2 months too long?
What did I ever do to him?
What happened between us the day we last kissed and now?
Does he really want to still be friends?
And when he said " I love you " did he really mean it?

I wish i could answer your questions. but, im still trying to answer mine.


To a guy, a girl is one chapter. To a girl, he's the whole book.
He's her drug and she's addicted. but time is that little patch you put on your arm that slowly makes you forget about it. I dont want to forget. Because it was the one and only thing that made me get up in the morning instead of lying there thinking today was going to be a piece of shit.

I could never just become friends again. I would miss the good parts. Like When we held hands, hugged everyday after school, or gotten my first kiss.

so bored

laptop isnt really working lately...just incase ur wondering y i havent been posting alot.

not much has happened in the past couple of days...
gotta go.
Ember 4 evr

i HATE planes

ok, i kno i havent been posting very much lately. my laptop needed to b charged. not the easiest thing to do while constanly running for your life. oh well, wat can u do?
planes. huge, flying, metal death traps. i feel so closterfobic in them. and i am truely sorry to all the spelling bs out there, i dont know how to spell closterfobic.

ok, i guess were headed to hawaii to stop some guy from dropping some bomb thing. dont ask me, i have no idea wats going on. go to evanna's blog. you would honest;y think we would have the same blog...i know wat your thinking, y dont you? well, that makes two of us.

well i got to go. gettin some turbulance. ttfn

Ember 4 evr

aaawwww

saria thats sooooo cute. id give almost anything to sleep in my boyfriends arms. and then kiss him. but, me, not such a big fan of having a smallish person watching majority of the time...thaaaaaat would suck. ess you see kay SUCK!

but if it meant spending the night ( in a non-purverted way ) with the man im in love with. well, thatd just b worth it. thats pretty much how desperate i am. <3

Ember 4 evr

Really cold...

its a good think evanna bought us all jackets. but if she was really the smartmytant freak ive come to know, she would have bought socks. ya know those BIG bags of like 7 pairs for like, one buck. and mittens. i cant feel my fingers.

saria left us. for hawaii. well who can blame her. its nice and warm in hawaii. if i had to get banished anwhere...id sure hope for it to b somewhere in the tropics. id also want to see my boyfriend too. its been so long since ive actually SEEN my boyfriend. we email each other. and we IM each other. angd this is the coolest part about him: hes cool with my wings. how awesome is that? so, saria, evanna. i kno exactly what that feeling is when u kiss ur first and only love.

that feeling when u kiss someone and everything around u becomes hazy,

and the only thing in focus is u and that person,

and u realize that this is the only person u should b kissing 4 a long time.

And for that one moment you get this amazing gift, all cuz you feel so lucky that youve found it,

but so scared that itll all go away at the same time.

ya, i know that feeling...

Ember 4 evr

Sooooooooooooooooooooooooooooo Bored

all ive been doing all day has been watching evanna circle over our heads, cursing to herself. trust me, not as fun as it sounds. it doesn't even sound fun. honestly, someone should tell her to channel her anger better. because when her wings get tired of flying, she comes back down to the ground. and when she comes back down to the ground, she takes all her anger out on us. dont get me wrong, ive only known her for a couple days, but geez. when she gets mad, she raises all he**.

Ember 4 evr

Life is like a pack of gum. i have yet to figure out why

no. seriously. im trying to figure out y life would b like a pack of gum. and for the record, its really hurting my brain. =(

Ember 4 evr

This really SUCKS

ok. there really isnt much to say this early in the morning. O, except for the fact that saria might be leaving to go back to hawaii. evanna told me that she was going to take me and alice. NO WAY! i just met my fellow mutant freaks and now, we might b spliting up. WAY not cool. i finally feel part of something and now, something like THIS happens! i really cant believe it! ok. im gonna stop raining on everyones happy parade and talk bout some optomistic things.



HERES A TIP: never, and I MEAN NEVER, take a drink from the pond thing when saria has just taken a bath. ESPECIALLY when she hasn't bathed in 4 ever! eww, nasty. now my mouth tastes like dragon/hybrid.

idk y, but i feel REALLY random today. and i like, JUST woke up. weird.

i gotta go.

Ember 4 evr

sleep...need...sleep...so...tired...

uuuuuuggggggghhhhhhhhhh. that has been my most used word of the day. if u cant guess y, then...u need a little help. no offense. ya kno, when someone says 'no offense' it doesnt take away from the fact that there was actually offense that i took. if u can understand that. cuz i cant. im totally out of it today. like, im not kidding. like i forgot what 8 plus 8. i effin thought it was 19! its fricken 16! uuuuuuhhhhh.

ok. i seriously thought i wuz like the only mutant freak left in this big twisted world. man was i waaaay off. i met Evanna, and her gang. i think she called it the Evanna and the Flyers. and i met saria. shes awesome. but she isnt like me or evanna. she doesnt have bird-like wings like us. shes a dragon hybrid. how kool is that? we can all fly though. sometimes i wonder if she evr wants to be normal. or at least like, us. like have bird dna instead of dragon dna. but come on, that if fricken AWESOME!

ya know. sometimes i am sooooooooo glad i don't know who my parents are. i used to have some friends up in north dakota and their parents were horrible. they beat their kids. ='( i mean, why would someone do that? to their own kids. did u know that most abusers profess to love the ones they abuse. how can u love what you abuse? you cant. which is exactly my point. most kids with "normal" parents hate how their parents r always embarrassing them and being over protective. like when you get the most WONDERFUL, LOVING, CARING BOYFRIEND EVER, and ur parents wont let you b alone with him cuz they dont want u to get hurt or anything like that. but i bet kids with abusive parents would do anything for that "over protectiveness" for their parents to actually care about them for once or twice in their lives.
i bet ur wondering y im preaching 2 u bout this. idk y either. i just felt the need to put it out there in the open, i guess. wats mostly left are those who were abused, or those who enjoy the power of it. power is wat they seek. and anyone who gets it will abuse anyone or anything to keep it.

im gonna be posting a thing about abuse soon to came so ya. ok, i gotta stop evanna from channeling all her anger into the air before the sky gets so clouded with pessemistic stuff we cant even c past our wings. (o ya, my wingspan is officially 14.5 ft!) bye!

P.S. u guys feel free 2 comment on anything im writing about. im here 4 ya! luv ya always and forever!

Ember 4 evr

O.M.J.

Orange Mango Juice! y isnt there a word that rhymes with orange?! thats retarted! unbelievable! to the people out there reading this, if you want to help me make up a couple words that rhyme with orange, just drop a line. or you can comment to this post.

dipstick is such a weird word. what does it even mean?

Ember 4 evr

Don't Judge Us

ok. thats going to b the title of that poem. heres a shout out to Saria, "thanks for the title" its pretty awesome. anyway... got this huge blood blister the size of...idk, but something big on my hand from climbing a tree to get food. youd think i could just fly there. but, no. there is just always an eraser or two around. God forbid i have two minute of peace. which sucks. it sucks eggs. rotten eggs. eww. ok new subject. im leaving for like, kentucky in two days. idk, Phillip (and if we remember is the little voice in my head) "keeps saying wait for the oportune moment." whatever the heck that is supposed to mean. so yea. maybe i sould keep a list of where ive been and where ill go. that would make me feel a little more in control if you know what i mean. if you dont know what i mean, i mean like, not having an obnoixous voice in my head. which, i must admit can b pretty helpful sometimes. o yea. but i wouldn't recomend it. o well. i got to go cook this racoon thing. (youd think that if i have a laptop, which i stole, i would have like food and other necessities. well, i dont, just, fyi)

-Ember 4 evr

(yet to think of a good name for this poem) if you have any good ideas, comment or email me

i to eye

we see the same

but still we judge the differences

is this not wrong?

is this really right?

think to yourself

before you prove

yourself a fool

This sucks

You know what i just noticed? when i post a blog it goes to the top. so when a not-so-bright person comes along and reads it, they would probably read the last post to the first. okward. anyway, im pretty bored. does anyone want to know a question that has been haunting me forever? (not haunting, and not forever, about 5 minutes) Why do waffles have squares in them? y cant they b like circles or triangle? or hearts? hearts would be cool. really cool. why do they even call them waffles? what if pancakes were called waffles and waffles were called pancakes? what twisted world would we be in? wait a sec. we r already in a twisted world! nevermind. o, what if chicken were called strawberries and strawberries were called chicken? and what does straw have anything to do with berries?! these area the questions that haunt me. *horrifiying music* cant you tell im pretty bored? if u cant u need some caffine or something. ya know whats weird? i havent even had anything with sugar in it. except peach ice tea. i like mine with alot of sugar! rock on! anyway. i should really go

-Ember 4 evr

I Found Some Socks!

ya. right now im trying to lie low. i was working on my banking when i saw some erasers. they r getting better and better at flying. anyway, onto a more positive note... i found some socks. theyre really warm. im thinking i should leave montana pretty soon. but something in my gut...(and the voice in my head) is telling me to stay. but i c no reason too. its not like something is going to happen. well other than being killed by erasers anyway. God forbid i have a normal life with a normal family. ha ha. not funny. anyhoo, the voice in my head keeps talking to me in metaphors. at this very instant, he is saying "Don't try so hard, the best things come when you least expect them to. Remember, what ever happens happens for a reason!" That is what the voice in my head is saying. ok from now on, lets just call the voice in my head, Phillip. ya. thats what phillip is saying. ok, i got to go. i c some erasers. bye.

-Ember 4 evr

Too cold to think of a title, someone get me some socks!

Ya. its really cold up here in the moutains. all alone. by myself.
(And the voice in my head) Incase ur the kind of person who likes to look at the world upside-down and read things backwards, my name is Ember. im a normal teenage girl with avian DNA. This goes out to all u non-brainiacks out there (rock on): that means i have wings, weigh under 100 lbs and need 3,000 calories a day. im always on the run. Running from erasers. erasers r humans that morph into wolves. and get this they have recently had some wings slapped onto theirs backs. now they can fly. sort of. they r more like flying couches or refrigerators. well i gotta get back to finding some socks in this run-down cabin. c ya latr.

-Ember 4 evr

Oct. 13, 2007

This is my first post. I'm in the mountains in Montana. All alone. By myself. How sad. This totally sucks... I'm over it. :) Well anyway, I guess I should mention, I'm 14, blonde wavy hair, (when it isn't straitened) light blue eyes and tan skin. So I'm basically your average teenage girl. My hair NEVER goes the way I want it to. My temporary rooms (plural cuz I'm always on the run) NEVER stay clean for more than a day. And there is this guy I'm totally CRAZY about. And oh ya. I have WINGS, and an annoying, sarcastic voice in my head who tells me what to do. COMPLETELY normal.

-Ember 4 evr